A 2003 study revealed that 34 percent of all women over 40 in the survey were dating younger men, and 35 percent preferred dating older men. Another recent study found that in recent years, 25 percent of brides have been younger than their boyfriends. Finally, in a recent Cosmopolitan poll, 29.3 percent of men said they would date an older woman.
Why is this trend gaining popularity? I think there are two main reasons. The first is that 30 years ago, there weren’t that many single women over 30. Most people married in their 20s and stayed married, no matter what. As divorce became more socially acceptable, women in their 30s (referred to as “cougars”) and 40s (referred to as “cougars”) began to enter the dating scene. However, they often found that men their age preferred younger women. Their options were generally relegated to men 15 to 20 years older than them. However, many of these women were young at heart, vibrant and attractive and did not want to be with someone much older.
The second reason is finances. Just as economically independent men often prefer younger women, economically independent women often prefer younger men. Now that women are no longer bound by finances and social norms and customs are loosening, they can finally make more honest decisions when it comes to a partner.
What about younger men? Why would they be interested in an older woman? The reasons cited are due to the confidence that an older woman exudes. She knows who she is and is comfortable with herself. She is honest and straightforward. An older woman knows what she wants and what she doesn’t want. He does not play games and has more control of his emotions, which translates into less drama. An older woman is generally a better lover and is more in touch with her femininity and sensuality.
What about older women? What do they get from being with a younger man? How about a toned, muscular body, little to no baggage (depending on age, no mommy baby drama or nasty exes), vitality, energy, enthusiasm, appreciation, stamina, and someone who is always “ready to go”? A younger man does not feel threatened by his achievements, he admires and encourages them.
What do older men think about these relationships? Although I do not think it is any of your business, everyone has a right to have a say and most of the time it is not positive. The old double standards still exist. Older men who date younger women are admired and considered studs. Older women who date younger men are often looked down upon and considered foolish.
What do younger women think about these relationships? Those who feel threatened by the changing dating landscape should keep in mind that older women are leading the way. If they are single or divorced when they are older, they will have a wider variety of men to choose from.
Tribal thinking is strong, but I think it will eventually catch up with current reality. In 15-20 years, these types of relationships will no longer be so important. Welcome to the “Cougar Revolution”.
